We are diving in deep today to talk about money dams and how they are stopping your money flow.
So what is a money dam?
It is a set of narratives or beliefs that is keeping money from flowing to you, AND also from keeping money with you if you don’t have the right barriers in place.
By understanding how you are actually blocking money, you can learn how to remove those dams, eliminate this self-destructive behaviour and rewire your brain with new thoughts and beliefs that will help heal your mind around creating wealth.
We are going to utilise the power of mental rehearsal to change your brain and body around money for the future.
Money dams and limiting beliefs on the unconscious level are where I find the jackpot with most private coaching clients. Most of us have these beliefs that we are aware of unconsciously, even if we might be aware consciously that something is amiss with it.
And so you might be asking yourself or even starting this episode with some judgement, as to why if you know you have an issue in an area, haven’t you worked through it, or you might be even stuck going around in a circle.
The easy answer is that deep down there is a reason for you not to heal and not to move forward.
Now I know that your ego or conscious mind might be fighting with this, and it might even sound ridiculous, but stick with me and by the end of this episode it will all make sense and you will wonder why you didn’t know this sooner!
You may or may not already know about money memory and money story from other sources.
Money memory means the first memory that you’ve ever had around money. Examples from clients include their pocket money and gifting of money for special occasions and also parents money struggles.
If you’ve done money story work before, or even if you haven’t think about how you would describe your relationship with money. Are you in flow, like a long term relationship? Are you great at creating it, but not holding onto it?
Are you not good at creating it, and don’t spend at all, and then feel guilty? This would all be part of what we call your money story as it relates to your relationship with money.
In our episode today we are going to be looking at money dams differently, specifically related to neuroscience, biomechanics, epigenetics and some Reiki for good measure.
Part of the base concept that we are going to accept for truth for this episode is around soft-wired patterns, in that there is a stimulus or set of actions that trigger off a familiar routine.
One of these soft-wired patterns is around money. These soft-wired patterns are created around our past experiences, our parent’s or primary careers views, examples of money flow, and here is where the epigenetics comes in, even the generational / inherited beliefs around money.
Here’s an analogy that might help you to understand what epigenetics is.
Think of the human lifespan as a very long movie. The cells would be the actors and actresses, essential units that make up the movie. DNA, in turn, would be the script — instructions for all the participants of the movie to perform their roles. Subsequently, the DNA sequence would be the words on the script, and certain blocks of these words that instruct key actions or events to take place would be the genes.
The concept of genetics would be like screenwriting. Follow the analogy so far? Great. The concept of epigenetics, then, would be like directing. The script can be the same, but the director can choose to eliminate or tweak certain scenes or dialogue, altering the movie for better or worse. After all, Steven Spielberg’s finished product would be drastically different than Woody Allen’s for the same movie script, wouldn’t it?
So what if you can change the direction/ or dialogue in certain scenes around money to change the movie? Sounds pretty great right?
Okay so back to beliefs, and beliefs don’t have to be based in truth, they are not fact. They are generalisations and we don’t consciously decide what they are. Limiting beliefs - which is another term for beliefs that block - create a tainted lens through which we start to see certain situations and skew our perceptions.
This lens keeps us stuck in life-limiting thoughts and patterns.
Believing these limits, we continue to live within the confines of them, further fulfilling that limiting belief, which helps create our reality.
The limiting beliefs then create a pattern of self-sabotage.
And today we are going to change those patterns.
The first task that we are going to look at is your reptilian response (that which you don’t even think about) to different forms of money flow.
You are going to think of different money flow situations, from it coming in through work, to someone gifting you money, to paying invoices and receiving bills.
This doesn’t have to be a one-time activity and the more curious you get with the emotive response to these situations the deeper an understanding you will have of your unconscious mind, consciously.
So why is this important?
Well, your brain is a recording machine, and it is recording those response patterns at a biomechanical level.
If you do your money response audit and the overwhelming or cumulative emotions are negative, your unconscious mind can decide money = stress & worry = negative.
Thus creating this soft-wired pattern that money is to be avoided, or repelling any money situation as your mind, body and soul are trying to save you from discomfort.
And as humans, we love to replicate.
So any familiar memories, such as an investment or bill landing, reminds us to reproduce the same experiences. Letters from the taxman must be bad before we’ve even opened it = stress = negative and your pattern is running.
Now that you know your “emotive” response to certain money related patterns we are going to go even deeper and look at the automated thought process that runs as the 2nd part of your process, once the pattern has been kicked off.
This is part of the old circuit of your pattern that we are going to rewire. But for now, take the time to look and I would suggest writing down at what are the automatic thoughts that you have once the emotion has been identified.
Examples to help you could include:
More than likely as you’ve started doing task #2 you’ve already slipped into or demonstrating the next part of your pattern, the behaviour we demonstrate when we experience the limiting belief.
Each of these can be unique to the situations/ patterns you’ve been working through, and I ask you to start to notice them and record them down. This deeper level of awareness around behaviour can be uncomfortable at first, so I’ve got some options to get you started:
These are just some examples, but by no means an exhaustive list.
Now we have identified the conditioned soft-wired pattern that you are running around money, and it is time-shift them consciously.
Step 1 – Imagine yourself in the situation that you have identified previously that had a negative emotion attached.
Step 2 – Imagine the ideal scenario of how you would like to feel, what thought you would like to say and how you would like to behaviour in the exact same situation.
Got one? Good.
Step 3 – Now go back and repeat step 1, when you are there and feel the emotion shout ‘Shift” out loud inside your head, and go right into your #2 scenario.
Step 4 - Think of a scenario similar to the scenario in step #1 when you could have fallen into that pattern you no longer want – shout ‘Shift” out loud inside your head and find yourself in step #2 - scenario.
Step 5 – Think of a scenario at any point in time in the future, whereas you grow in your business, you miss a goal. Any negative emotions, thoughts or behaviour start, shout ‘Shift” out loud inside your head and go to scenario #2.
You can do this for each individual scenario, and keep repeating as often as desired.
When you’re ready to explore your legacy, success and impact on the world, here are ways to start the journey:
Be.Boosted - A virtual event to take your professional service business and life to the next level. Join me for a 6 day immersive experience in November where you will leave with your business and you boosted. https://www.laurapaynestanley.com/be-boosted
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They involve taking you away from the normal life for you to elevate, and past Immersive experience locations include new York, Mallorca, Ibiza, Scotland, Geneva and upcoming for London, Vancouver and Toronto later this year.